Just a little sister
by MrsRawr
Summary: Like a little sister, she held in her emotions for him. But now, at a time where she has finally renewed herself as a prettier, cuter and stronger individual, was she ready to get out of this one-sided love?
1. I'm trying to move on

**MsRawr: **Hey there! YO! I'm back! Yes, yes, my Pen name was ONCE MsRawr but I had forgotten my password for the account and to that specific email so yeah. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this story. I wanted to try something different so I'm hoping you like it. Thanks!

**Disclaimer: I do not own Shugo Chara **

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**I'm trying to move on**

It was a new year. New start.

Amu watched herself in the mirror carefully. Her hand rose up slowly to touch her new hair and new face. She was different now. Taller, prettier and cuter. All the emotional breakdowns she's had.. For her dream guy. She knew he had a girlfriend. She knew he was a player- popular to all girls of every type. She knew he would never like her. She was aware of it all.

It was time to step out of her shell now; show him what she is and even.. Even forget about him.

Was she ready?

'Who knows?' She mumbled

Amu stepped forward to let soon-to-be train passengers stand in the cramped area beside her. She fought back any stray tears that were soon to come.

_'Amu?' Ikuto said softly, his hand resting on hers._

_'Mm?' She murmured- not wanting anything to ruin the moment._

_'Your short.'_

_'YOU RETARD!#$%^%^#'_

She closed her eyes, remembering any insult or flaw of hers that he had pointed out casually- noting how it had seemed as though he hadn't really cared about how she had felt.

_'WOAHH! You have a moustache that is even more noticeable than mine!' He laughed, examining it carefully- although it was much to her embarassment._

_'Shut-UP!' She half mumbled- her face now brighter than ever. _

_'Aww, it's okay little sister' He had said, before getting off the train and turning around to wave to her like a lunatic._

But she had smiled. No matter what insults he had thrown at her, she had smiled her way through it, hoping he was only joking.

_'Amu, you'll always be my little sister yeah?'_

'THIS TRAIN WILL STOP AT..'

Amu snapped out of her trance.

Her eyes scanned the platform outside the train doors that were soon to open. A crowd of people had already started to form at the door. No sign of him.

Amu sighed. Maybe he wasn't coming? It was a good thing right? After all, it's much easier getting over someone if you don't see them.

Amu looked down at her phone, trying to occupy herself and hide any disappointment. Oh yes, it was going to be one long train ride.

As the doors opened slowly, people rushed in- before moving off to either the top or bottom of the carriage to sit down. She couldn't help but steal a peek.

She watched a group of boys walking in last- all talking to each other about something of a humorous manner. They were all wearing the same uniform. _His _uniform.

To some extent, she was relieved that at least some other school students were there. Although they had happened to be _his _friends, she ignored it.

'YO.'

That voice.

That all-too familiar voice. Amu cringed slightly- reluctantly looking up.

Yeah, it was him alright. The guy who had teased her countless times. The guy who would pick her up after her tutoring classes. The player. The popular one. The 'brother' she had fallen in love with.

Tsukyomi Ikuto.

Amu nodded slightly as if to return his greeting. She hadn't cared what he thought of her at that exact moment. Or so she told herself that.

Yes, she was nervous. Hell nervous. She had practically spent her whole morning trying to look her best for him- hoping that he'll fall for her new look and practically fall in love with her.

But we all know that it's never going to happen.

She knew it so well.

'Woah! My lil' sis has grown up!' She heard her crush say.

The words; 'Little sister'

It stung. It pierced. It stabbed.

It hurt whatever she had left of a heart.

He would only ever treat her as a little sister- being sweet to her, being over protective of her, being a big brother to her.

It wasn't fair.

In sad love stories, there would always be two best friends who can't seem to confess to each other in

Fear that the 'friendship' would be ruined.

What about her?

Best_friend _can turn into girl_friend_.

But sister? That's considered 'incest'

Now, you may argue that it doesn't matter because they aren't even real blood-related siblings but Amu was aware that Ikuto could never love her- and maybe, calling her his 'sister' was the easiest way of rejecting her.

"Hey, hey!" that same voice continued, interrupting her train of thought.

She looked up and nodded again, a tiny blush creeping onto her face as she looked into his eyes.

"You feeling okay? You seem to be daydreaming more than usual. What, tired from being on Facebook all night?" he said, smirking, "when will you ever get real friends huh?"

She groaned, her eyes slowly resizing into slits- sending 30 seconds worth of intense hate rays.

"Whoa, whoa relax there!" he chuckled, raising his arms up to his face to defend himself, "you know I'm only joking! I'm a nice person, I wouldn't be that mean!"

"Oh ha-ha! And what, pigs can fly? You have a life? Yeah? I can think of heaps more bull-shit than you can," she retorted immediately, rolling her eyes as she did.

She then waited. With her quick, smart comments, he would always look at her with a fake glare- before 'punishing' her with slaps, pats, fatal hugs or even trying to force her to give him a piggy back. As her hazel eyes had searched his mesmerizing, blue ones, her breath hitched. A blush quickly crept onto her cheeks- sending her head to the side to save embarrassment.

"I wouldn't be that mean to my little sister.. I really care about you!" he said softly- and for once, a sincere smile adorned his face.

And although the words had kept on stabbing, it didn't matter to her right at that moment. I mean, you can't stab a pool of water. Or at least in Amu's case, it was whatever she had left of a heart, melted into the small, warm puddle of 'luuuurrvee'.

Should she be thankful that this method had saved her humiliation? Could she be satisfied with just this?

Amu couldn't answer any of the questions that surged into her mind that night. After restlessly tossing and turning, she finally came to a conclusion.

No matter what the outcomes are, the journey is going to hurt her a lot.

Unless she can get out of it.

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**MsRawr: **Yaaay! It's finished! Hmm, I'm not really sure where I can go with this. But I'm willing to experiment. Thanks for reading and I hope you liked it! You are MORE than welcome to leave a review. Be it for support or as constructive criticism.

Enjoy your time fanfic-ing! :D


	2. The plan

**MsRawr**: Sorry for the extremely late updates. I have fricking 3 different copies of this 2nd chapter of the story because I didn't know which approach to take. Initially, I wrote one that I was quite satisfied with- but when I had read it as a continuation to the last chapter, it barely made any sense. I figured it was because the theme/style is different to what I'm used to so it's hard for me to write this unless I'm completely feeling it (ooh) LOL. Well, what I'm trying to say is.. that this may not make sense for you and that there will be little dialogue because that's the style established in the first chapter so this may be sucky. To be honest, I had given up on writing this so many times because the first chapter was intended to only be a drabble/one-shot from the beginning- hence the lack in plot line hints. Bear with me, though. If it really sucks, I'll delete it and leave it as a one-shot. So please review what you think. Thanks.

IN SHORT: if this seems out of place and nothing like the first chapter / or that it really sucks, tell me. I'll delete it immediately. I really love this story so I don't wanna ruin it with this lousy chapter.

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN SHUGO CHARA.**

Read the bottom A/N as well please :D

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**The plan**

_Amu waited nervously on the train. It was about to stop at Ikuto's stop and she was determined to forget about him for real this time. No blushing. No daydreaming __about__ him anymore. Yesterday she had stuffed up- but that would be the last of it._

_And, like she had expected, her crush had stepped onto the train with his group of friends. When he saw her, he had smiled and waved as usual._

_They spent their time talking, Amu feeling herself stiffen as she refrained herself from breaking down._

_It had hurt her- the realisation that she couldn't and shouldn't see him the way she does._

'_Oh yeah Amu I forgot to ask why you decided to change your look, huh?' Ikuto had asked in a playful tone._

_Amu's heart started to beat rapidly._

'_YOU!' She had wanted to scream. But she couldn't._

'_It's none of your business.' Amu had replied coldly._

'_Well, I guess so. But who-ever this lucky guy is, you should just say it outright. It makes it a lot easier.'_

_She was frozen. Turning to face him with wide eyes, one side of her jumped in joy while the other was on the verge of tears. _

_Not being able to take it anymore, she uttered 'Shut up' soft but firmly- her tone wavering slightly as if to plead for him to stop._

_But he didn't._

'_It's not a bad thing! You look very nice. It makes me proud to have you as a sister!' _

_The world had gone blank for Amu- her body and heart completely numb. _

Amu slowly made her way past the elegant, tall black gates of Seiyo High. With her bag casually thrown over one shoulder, she had confidently cruised along with her chin up high.

And, as expected, the students scattered across the playground around her had turned their heads to her direction.

Some whispered things to each other whilst others had stars in their eyes.

But behind her confident facade, she felt her inner-self slouch from the uneasiness.

She knew her worn-out eyes betray her otherwise radiant facade. She felt horrible.

At school, she was the popular one- the 'Hot and Spicy Hinamori Amu'.

She had been known to have received countless love letters and confessions.

But she had rejected them all.

Because of him.

Her friends had told her many times that it was pointless- she only being his 'little sister'.

'_Amu, if anything, the whole brother-sister game is only for his amusement. I'm not trying to discourage you but that's just how it seems.' Rima had said to her- for what had seemed to be the 50__th__ time._

But, she continued to be in love with him. Because to her, there was no-one else that could make her feel as she did. He had made her smile, blush, laugh- and enjoy being who she was.

He was also the only one that had made her cry or daydream countless times- all without knowing it.

'Amu-chan!' A sweet voice called out from across the court.

Amu whipped her head around to find the source of the noise and in turn, was met with a cute, porcelain-doll-like character.

'Ohaiyo Rima-chan,' Amu called back as the pair both walked towards each other.

As she got closer to her friend though, she felt her mask slowly crumble.

Yet she couldn't do anything.

It was uncomfortable and it made her anxious. The fact that she was supposed to keep her cool throughout everything.

Remain calm when people around her had said things about her- and remain calm when inside, her heart was being broken.

'Wow! You look great! It's cute!' Rima exclaimed excitedly- examining Amu carefully as she did. Realising she was off topic, though, she continued, 'Anyway, you texted that you wanted to see me about something. What is it?' she had asked in a caring tone- one which was reserved only for the closest of friends.

Amu drew in one long breath and let her bangs cover her eyes. She looked up with one sad smile- her brows furrowed slightly and her lips twisted to the side.

It was time. She knew it would hurt her and the only way to stop it is to get out of it. She can't continue living like this. Her new look was her last, desperate attempt- but like everything else she had tried, it had failed.

Ikuto was never going to love her.

Not now, not ever.

'O-okay. Did something happen this morning? Or yesterday afternoon?' Rima had continued carefully- not really getting what was going on.

Amu's breath hitched. Rima had hit the spot.

Since they had gone to different schools, those were the times they had spent together on the train. Amu had always mused to herself that her love story was like one of the dramas she had watched. Where a pair would meet in an unusual setting but then as a bond grows between the strangers (that happened to see each other every day), their love would bloom.

It was fun. It was the few minutes that she enjoyed- that kept her going throughout the day.

Yet, as though someone above had been playing a sick joke on her, 'it' had never happened. She was forever cursed with the 'little sister' position.

'I guess. But then again, no, it was as it always had been. He was nice to me- and it fuelled my denial. I tried, I really did. I tried everything- I tried to get over him, I tried this new look for him. But, as usual, it didn't work,' Amu forced out a soft, fake laugh, before continuing, 'it's pathetic, really. I can't continue like this. Every day, I wake up with a little light of hope in my heart that he'll look my way. I used to think that I should have been grateful with being able to be close to him at all- knowing that there are girls that would die to be in my position. To have him smile at me, make me laugh and care for me all the time.. but..'

Rima stood there, unable to say anything.

Finally, she managed to utter, 'A-amu-chan calm dow-'

'This is more painful than anything else. It's a sick joke, really. All of it. I used to think I looked too deeply into the situation being the girl I am but now I can't take it anymore,' Amu was sobbing now, feeling all her balled up emotions slowly unravel itself, 'I'm just a little sister. I really want to continue being beside him but this isn't it. I know it's selfish of me to say it but I feel so uncomfortable. If I say something, it'll all be ruined. If I don't, I continue to feel uncomfortable.' By now Amu's words were picking up pace to match that of her heart beats. 'I heard he got a new girlfriend. The 30th one this year, perhaps. I hear that they are all so much prettier than me and that I don't stand a chance. People admire me and they like my new look but why doesn't Ikuto see that? Yesterday, I tried my best to get over him. And look, now what? I spent my whole day thinking about him. It hurts Rima, it really does. I try to forget about him and then when he looks at me I feel myself fall for him all over again!'

With the last word, Amu broke down into tears, feeling all the walls she was trapped in slowly tumble down on her.

It wasn't fair.

She felt like she wanted to hate him- she really did. But she couldn't. This wasn't his fault. He just didn't feel that way about her and there wasn't anything either of them could do about it.

Rima wrapped her thin arms around her friend firmly- feeling Amu's chest heave with pain.

The pair then made their way to the office- where Amu had then been put down in sick-bay.

'I'm just a little sister..' Amu had wailed softly as Rima pulled the thin, white blanket over her.

'Look Amu. I have tried to tell you many times to get over him because it's an endless, painful cycle with this brother-sister thing,' Rima began. Now sighing, she continued, 'But it seems as though you care about him a lot. You obviously don't want to hate him so we have to do the next best thing. But first thing is that you need to promise me that you will actually try your best to forget him this time, got it?'

Amu nodded. She sniffled and drew out both of her hands from under the blanket and harshly wiped her red, tear-stained face.

'Then we'll have to take the next approach.' Rima declared- setting her foot hard onto the ground.

Amu looked back at her friend curiously- now sitting up to carefully listen to what Rima had to say.

'We're going to find you someone new.'

As Rima's last words echoed in Amu's foggy mind, the pair were interrupted by the sound of thundering footsteps.

'HINAMORI-CHAN! ARE YOU OKAY?' A voice screamed out worryingly as the owner of the voice hastily made his way across to the bed Amu was laying on.

'O-oh hi Tadase-kun,' Amu replied suddenly, surprised by the unexpected intrusion.

She ducked her head down to shield herself from being seen in the state she was and only nodded softly.

'Oh I see your alright then,' Tadase finally let out once he had regained his composure and had come to an abrupt stop beside Rima. The blonde prince-like boy let out a sigh of relief before nervously adding, 'The others are coming later but I just wanted to make sure you're alright.'

Amu felt herself break into a soft smile as she watched him rub the back of his head as though he had been embarrassed by his outburst.

He was the prince that had always cared about her. Sure, back last year she had a major crush on him as he was so perfect and sweet. But when Ikuto had come into her life, everything had changed. Tadase was now only just a brother to her.

Amu's eyes widened.

In realisation of what she had just thought, she felt her heart being clenched all over again.

She was such a hypocrite!

She didn't want Tadase to go through the pain she did.

Glancing at Rima quickly, she nodded as if to say something.

'_I guess I'll give Tadase-kun a chance.'_

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**MsRawr:** THERE. It sucks, I know. The plot line had been rushed (compared to the first chapter) and it barely made sense. I just wanted to upload this because this was probably the best one of out the 3 that I had typed up. If you guys don't mind this, I can probably continue the story from here but otherwise, I'll leave the story as a one-shot.

=/ if you have any advice then please share it in the reviews.

Sorry about the sour tone in my A/N and all, it's just that things have been messing up (especially this story) and I felt really bad about it all.

**BUT ON THE BRIGHT SIDE, THANKS TO ALL YOU REVIEWERS AND READERS!**

you guys kept me going with this story and made me feel like I needed to update for you guys. If you're disappointed with this though, I'm sorry. D:

Special thanks to : lolishoujo16! I appreciated the msg. (: YOU GO GIRL! ahahahha :L

HOPE YOU ENJOY YOUR TIME FANFIC-ING.

PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK AND REVIEW!

_**Oh and a delayed merry Christmas/happy new year to all of you. It's a new year now, wow! May 2011 bring happiness and good fanfic-ing to all of you ;D**_

_**How did you guys spend your holiday, by the way? I hope it was with family and friends you love! **_


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